Tuesday, April 14, 2009

I don't wanna get any pet anymore

Staring at the packet of the so called veterinary formulated kitten food with a blurred vision,
I have this question in my mind,
what is going to eat this in the coming days?

I think my kitten can't make it through tonight.
She can barely moved her body,
but she can't meow now.
She opened her mouth,
I know, she was intended to meow,
but no voice has came out.
I miss the super noisy her.

When I fed her milk,
the milk flowed out of the side of her mouth.
Yes, she is not capable of swallowing anything now.

I can't do anything now but to pray.
Namo Amitabha.
How I wish it is not 11pm now.
I doubt any veterinary clinic is still operating.

Don't die.
Give me a chance to bring you to the vet.
Give me a chance to feed you the kitten food I have specially bought for you.
Give me the chance to buy you a scratching post.
Give me the chance to buy you those ding-a-ling toys.
Give me the chance to groom you.
(yes shaddup. A cat isn't same with a dog. She will groom herself. Yea)
Give me the chance to love you, to sayang you, to pamper you, to spoil you.
Just, give me a chance to do all these for you.
Just, please.
Don't die.
Live on.
Stay strong.
I can't really relate this word to her now.

No picture of the super weak meowmee.
I really can't bear to capture a dying creature,
like how Kevin Carter did to an African child, with that infamous vulture.

Looking at the super skinny and weak kitten,
and speaking of the African child,
I suddenly have the urge to sponsor a child via World Vision.

update (12.42am)
Every blink is accompanied with tears.
I tried to examine her just now.
It's not shocking to see that there is no longer any movement on her stomache.
I hold back my tears for few minutes, and gave her a clearer examination.
Really. No movement.

I laid my hand on her head, and swept over it.
She's still warm, her body is still as soft.
It's still alive.

I gave her a longer observation,
she opened her mouth once in a while to take in air,
struggling through.
The pain is excruciating. By that, I don't mean the kitty. I mean my heart.

I'm gonna pray for her.
I'm gonna sit by her, until she takes in her last breath tonight.
I'm gonna make sure that there is someone to greet her goodbye.

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